we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
