fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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