Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
