I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
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