Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize