is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
