summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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