How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize
