Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
