do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I think your dad took our porno
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
