the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
She needs sedatives and a leash
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Randomize
