why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
