i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Randomize
