This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize