i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
