it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Randomize
