CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
i've created a new STD.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
