So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
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