what day is it and did you see me today?
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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