1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
