3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
