yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
sarcasm needs its own font
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
