White coat. Heels.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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