I just threw up on my dentist
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize
