I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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