I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize