all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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