I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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