Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
