I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Houston, we have a blender
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
