Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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