So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize