Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
