Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
