It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
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