So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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