so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
