Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize