Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Randomize
