I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
this will be a night to untag.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
She needs sedatives and a leash
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
