Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
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