There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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