Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
