The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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