I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
it was like having sex with a tree stump
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Let's get the cat blown out
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
