I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
You need a sexual gate keeper
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
