You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
