No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize
