So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Dignity is for republicans.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
