it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
