She said her name was "party"
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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