dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
